I had a few "pay it forward" moments, or moments of inner gratitude over the weekend.  Saturday began with a flat tire.  Fortunately, for me, a gentleman noticed it - not only did he advise me of my flat tire, he also changed it and put the "donut" on so I could make it to a tire shop, without having to call for roadside assistance.  I tried to "pay" him, to no avail.  He just reminded me to "help someone else".  I thanked him (a way of showing my inner gratitude), and we parted ways.  I did remember to get he and his wife's name so I can also send them a thank you card, a more personal thanks!
     From there, I went to the tire store where I had purchased a tire in May, knowing it would be covered if it was the one I had purchased from them.  It was not, however, it was repairable and they were kind enough to fix it, for no cost.  Another moment of inner gratitude.  And, inner gratitude does nothing, without sharing.  So, of course, I thanked the young man and expressed my appreciation for his kindness.
     Showing gratitude for someone's kindness toward you, and paying it forward to another, is a good standard for anyone's life.  If we pay attention, I think most days an opportunity will be given, to be kind ... whether it be kind words, actions, or deeds.
     As the weekend ensued, I was able to show kindness, and be helpful to a few people myself.  It's always heart-warming to be able to help, and not expect something in return.

"Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might
be the only sunshine he sees all day."  ~H. Jackson Brown

“There is no such thing as can’t.”  ~Christopher Reeve 
My mother used to tell me, "Can't never did anything!" ~nr lenz

"Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it."
~Author Unknown

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."  ~Leo Buscaglia

"Love someone who doesn't deserve it."  ~Author Unknown

I am intrigued with Oprah Winfrey's new t.v. channel.  Her programming is so refreshing, so different from other networks.  I've only caught her new show, "Life Class" a couple of times, however, I hope that this show can have an impact on thousands of people, even hundreds of thousands of people.  Her messages and "life lessons" could impact this planet, if people are truly "listening".  I caught her show this evening and there are two things I personally extracted that are so simple, yet so profound.  Maya Angelou's quote of, "When people show you who they really are, believe them - the first time."  And the therapist who said, "If you see crazy comin', cross the street!"  I do feel that, perhaps, she should have touched a little more on the fact that "people CAN change", but it has to come from within ... YOU can't change anyone.  None of us are perfect; that's part of the human condition.  We, too, have choices (free will) - to accept toxicity in relationships, or discard those relationships that impede our own personal progress - and move on ...

I had an interesting conversation with a customer today about cigarettes, and smoking.  She came in looking for a cutout of a "turkey" to use at an information booth for "The Great American Smokeout" campaign, offering information and resources available to those who have a desire to quit.  Not a teen, or young gal, but younger than me - the woman had beautiful skin, and no "roadmap" lines in her face.  Out of curiosity, I asked her if she'd ever been a smoker; her reply was what I anticiated, "No."  She then wanted to know if I was a smoker, or not.  My reply, "Yes, tobacco addiction had been a vice in my life."  I am free of them now, but it was after many years of a "see saw" effort - falling back, and quitting, and falling back - any of you who are smokers, or ex-smokers are familiar with that routine.  Because she was curious enough to want to know, I had to share "my" story ... she thanked me, and now has another success story she can share with others. 

     Thanks to my brother, who gave me our great grandparents' marriage certificate, I've had such an interesting journey so far in discoveries about our mother's genealogy.  Before getting this beautiful document, I had already found a cousin (by marriage) through a customer where I work.  He connected us together.  Come to find out, his great-grandfather and my grandfather were brothers, and I have photos of his great grandfather (he only has newspaper copy).  So, when I find those photos, I'm going to give him one of them.  I have many family photos that I have no one to rely on to help me learn who they are, and how they fit.  He has much more genealogy than I do.  We met, compared notes, shared things and now I'm walking (physically and on line) graveyards!  For me, there's something peaceful and serene about being in a graveyard.
     Now I feel as though I've hit "pay dirt", as the saying goes ... through my persistence in chasing the "Spellmeyer-Barnebey" genealogy trail, I've found so much more family - dead, and alive!!!  I've found yet, another relative in Ogallala.  We have yet to determine how our relationship falls together, cousins I think.
     I've also found a gentleman who lives in Florida (relative) who was commumicating (by letters and phone calls) with my Uncle Dick while he was still alive.  He was trying to arrange a meeting for the family elders to meet again.  ... and the interesting part of all that is, I have the letters that this man wrote to my Uncle Dick.  I'm so excited about all this.
     That's two cousins I've communicated with on line besides the cousin I met through my customer here at work.  We're all excited about the possibility of meeting.  With the onset of winter I'm sure nothing will happen until the spring or summer next year.  And they are all so thankful to me, being younger than them, that I am able to "fill the gaps" in their genealogy.  It's quite a task, but it is coming together.
     When it's time, it is my hope that my siblings and their families will help me to fill in some gaps I need to fill.  I would like to try to continue this so that I can leave it to my daughter, son-in-law, and two grandsons.  I've been able to go back several generations already with full names, geography, dates of births, marriages, children, and deaths.

     Words fascinate me, especially those that are "similar", either in spelling or pronunciation ... I like to know the "difference between" those kinds of words.  This lead me to  "dharma" and "karma", as a close friend and I have recently been discussing both.  I wanted to see if I remembered correctly from the 1960s the order, meaning, and usage of those two words.  It's all so fascinating because one thing leads to another - now it's up to me to decide what reflection those words take on to me.

First, the meanings, according to a dictionary:
dharma:  noun Hinduism,Buddhism. 1. essential quality or character, as of the cosmos or one's own nature. 2. conformity to religious law, custom, duty, or one's own quality or character. 3. virtue. 4. religion. 5. law, especially religious law.

karma:  noun 1. Hinduism,Buddhism. action, seen as bringing upon oneself inevitable results, good or bad, either in this life or in a reincarnation: in Hinduism one of the means of reaching Brahman. Compare bhakti(def. 1), jnana. 2. Theosophy. the cosmic principle according to which each person is rewarded or punished in one incarnation according to that person's deeds in the previous incarnation. 3. fate; destiny

     Beyond the "definitions", the origin and background of each word is also fascinating.  I've found through the years that my personality type (according to Meier's Briggs) is often a "fence sitter" and this is so true about myself.  I truly can see, understand, and show empathy on both sides of an issue.
     It seems that "dharma" is our moral fiber, our duty to do what's right for ourselves, family, community, and the universe, while on this earthly plane.  And "karma" is what results - our "reward" or "punishment" for the quality (or lack of it) of our character and virtue.  Both words are nouns, however, karma is the end result of an "action" word, or a verb.  Dharma is ... what it is (sorry, I detest that word but, here it applies).  Our "dharma"might be described by an adjective; no verb or action words need apply.
     These words are used in both Hinduism and Buddhism.
     As one website put it, "One's dharmic path in the next life is determined by their past karma."  And, another says, "Regardless of the religion, the tenet is the same ... ‘be kind to your fellow men and you will eventually receive an award.’"

Read more: Difference Between Dharma and Karma | Difference Between | Dharma vs Karma http://www.differencebetween.net/miscellaneous/difference-between-dharma-and-karma/#ixzz1bLsIHAnp

"Time is a dressmaker specializing in alterations."  ~Faith Baldwin

“In truth, people can generally make time for what they choose to do; it is not really the time but the will that is lacking.“ ~Sir John Lubbock

“Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” ~Will Rogers

“Do not confuse motion and progress. A rocking horse keeps moving but does not make any progress.”  ~Alfred A. Montapert

"Never let yesterday use up today."  ~Richard H. Nelson 

JUST BECAUSE
It’s such a warm ‘n fuzzy feeling
Whenever I think of you
And all the special times we share
It’s very simple, really … how
You’ve made my life worth living
Just because you’ve taken time to care
                         ~nr lenz (me)

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."  ~Marcel Proust

" Somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worth while, so when you are lonely, remember this is true:  Somebody, somewhere is thinking of you."
~Unknown

" Love can be a simple smile,
love can be the extra mile,
love can be the chance to say,
love made me think of you today!"
~Unknown

" Perhaps you'd be a bit surprised how often, if you knew, a joke, a song, a memory will make me think of you."  ~Unknown

It seems like the older I get, the faster the seconds, minutes, and hours seem to pass me by.  Now is the time in my life where I thought I would have more time ... WRONG ... too many interests and, with work, too little time (it seems).  Maybe if I find some quips and quotes about time and time management I may find a "nugget" or two that will assist me in accomplishing MORE as I age, not LESS ... hmmm, here goes ... Since I know that these will come too close to home, I may have to "interject" a bit of my own remarks, humor, or irony ...

"Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that’s the stuff life is made of."  ~Benjamin Franklin
     I think I must 'own' the word squander - my junior high report cards prove it.
      I 'wander' in my own mind and 'sqaunder' away too much time.
      Sometimes the truth hurts!  ~nr lenz

“Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.”  ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr
     OUCH!  ~nr lenz

"The bad news is time flies. The good news is you're the pilot."  ~Michael Altshuler
     The fact is, time flies.  The bad news is, I've been the pilot!  ~nr lenz

"The key is in not spending time, but in investing it."  ~Stephen R. Covey
      Where's that darn key?!  ~nr lenz

Most people spend their entire lives on a fantasy island called 'Someday I'll'.  ~Denis Waitley
      Such a clever play on words ... I want to tell him, "Quit talkin' 'bout me like that!"  ~nr lenz

There are so many wonderful quotes about time, time management (or lack of it), efficiency (or the lack of it), procrastination, etc.  It was difficult to choose just a few.  They all fell heavy in my lap, to some degree.  If you need some inspiration, or maybe a good ol' fashioned "kick in the ass", google 'time management' and check out a few sites.  I am a lover of quips and quotes because they are short, and full of impact!!

Well, I lost this (tsk, tsk) ... let me see if I can re-create it.  After losing a loved one, you may be surprised at the things that often "trigger" memories of them.  Triggers can be an aroma or fragrance, someone's voice, their laughter, a phrase, a song, a word or expression - even things as obscure as the way someone walks, how they dress or wear their hair, a painting, a knick knack - just something familiar that pulls your heartstrings.  That happened to me today, with a vendor. 

I called a vendor about an item that was marked as shipped, but we did not receive.  She advised me that they would ship it, at no cost, and was fumbling for the words to tell me things would then be fine.  I interjected and said to her, "Then everything will be copasetic, as they say."  Ironically, I have not used that term, in years, though it used to be a favorite one.  She fell silent for a moment.  She lost a brother (special, sweet is how she described him) to the miserable beast of cancer.  That expression was a favorite of his; an expression he often used.  She thanked me for using that expression.  She felt that was a "sign" and that her brother is looking down on her.  I thanked her,  for letting me be the messenger!  It was one of those 'warm 'n fuzzy' moments.